Tomorrow I'm going to continue my trip story. But today it's too late for a big post so I want to share my thoughts about feelings of depression atmosphere in Russia.
After my trip to Italy I felt strange by coming back to Russia. I realized that people here are less happy. They look very tensed by their problems. But I really would like to know why. Everybody has problems regardless of their nationality especially I can compare people here and in Europe because of Moscow location.
So we all here are very pressed by social and cultural views. Here in Russia you are born, then you have to graduate from school, then you have to enter the university, while your study in university you have to find a good job to have money to feed yourself, help to your parents and here, being studying in university you really should find your fiance. Or maximum after graduating from university. After that you have to have children and you should start to pay your credit for the flat to live in it.
Notice that I used word "have to". They all really think that you HAVE TO. It feels just in the air.
You're 25 and still not married?? Oh my god, what is your life going to be?? Poor thing.
You're 30 and still don't have a credit for the apartment? What are you thinking about? Where will you live when you're 70??
You're 28 and still no children? You know how old will you be when your child turns 15??
It's literally everywhere. So after spending all your childrhood and then youth in Russia you really think that you have to hurry with all that crap.
And look at Italians. Come on, 50 years old man can just pick me up with suggestions of spending a cool week together. And he would look like a pleasant man who talking about how life wonderful is. And they do. They really believe the life is a gift and it is wonderful regardless how old you are and what circumstances present in your life right now. And more over it is true and it is the reality of life.
And here you can hear anywhere that life sucks, or we were born just for suffering and many arguments about why life is not fair to them. It is just the way we live here. Work, suffer and depress ourselves and everyone around.
After the trip I stopped watch depressing videos and listen to russian depressive songs. And you know what I noticed? These songs and talks and videos are everywhere even if you don't watch or listen to them at home. For example, sunny day, you just are walking along the street and boom: Viktor Tsoy "Белый снег, серый лед на потрескавшейся землеее". It can just kill all your positive mood for a day.
Or take the famous russian poet, Esenin. Oh my god, what we learn at school! This guy killed himself. Everybody likes his poetry here!
Or the famous poetress Anna Akhmatova. This is horrible, but her closest relatives were repressed during her life and she was always unhappy. And everybody knows her name and she is famous around the world and there are so many songs on her poems. And they are so depressive...
All people here do much suffering! It is just like a hobby. We explain suffering, learn suffering, tell stories about suffering and people who suffered much. We learn poems about suffering by heart at school. We sing songs about unhappy love. When can be more interesting than suffering? Come on! To live is to suffer! To love is to suffer! It is all about suffering.
If you want just some postiive songs, you should listen to some soviet music (attention! not war ones!). And stop your "Белый снег, серый лед" in your head. Just stop it.
At the end here is the video about us, enjoy ;)